Live, learn, work, retire, die. So goes the rhythm of earthly existence for many of us. Included in there, of course, is engagement with the world, participation in needful endeavors, faithfulness to our beliefs, love for those we cherish, and leaving behind a legacy.
I never thought that I would one day retire as a priest, and I probably won’t. But now in my sixty-seventh year of life, I am looking forward to retirement from being a pastor. When/If this happens, I think I can be more of a priest, as others have been. A hundred years ago, most of our grandparents never heard of “retirement;” the word wasn’t common then. Most people simply worked till they died. Some say, “Life is work.” Some say, “Life is to be enjoyed.” Some say, “Find a job you love, and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.” All those statements are, to some degree, true. And in various moments along life’s journey, we embrace them.
But, periodically, it’s a challenge to do so. As priest, I love helping people move along their spiritual path, especially recognizing how God is working in their lives. I am grateful to be with families on vital occasions (weddings, funerals, baptisms…); I enjoy accompanying them as they maneuver through life changes, sacramental grace, and next chapters. I am grateful to get to serve as an emissary between generous people and those who are in need. I believe that I was called to be a priest more than a pastor. As pastor, I don’t do well with parishioners who have consumer mentalities (rather than discipleship attitudes), those that complain about everything from the room temperature to a visiting priest. I can’t wait to escape the bureaucratic systems of our corporate church: its fears of the IRS, canon law, and hierarchical structures. I am eager to bid farewell to those who worship the church rather than worship God and those with a narrow lens that make their politics their religion (I get accused often by those on the right of being too liberal and by those on the left of being too conservative). When I retire as pastor, I want to continue assisting in urban churches by presiding at sacraments and offering spiritual direction or counsel to any who desire it; I want to do more to build up the church’s presence in our inner city that can be easily ignored or abandoned, yet I long to be free from attending meetings, filing reports, or dealing with administrative duties.
Early in priesthood, I’m sure that I was naïve and driven by rules; I pray that I have become more thoughtful, compassionate, and empathetic through the years. I am certain that I have become less concerned for religion while becoming more interested in God’s grace and in guiding people to find sacred connections in everyday encounters, touch the thin veil between this world and those beyond, and open themselves to broader mystical experiences. In comparison, I think the rules, rubrics, and regulations of the institution have limited value.
Educator Stephen Covey famously instructed followers to “begin with the end in mind.” He thought that we do better in earthly undertakings when we have clarity about our goals and destination. Christian believers have the goal of heaven and an interior compass that directs us to our true home. I hope that I can recognize each stage of life as a new steppingstone toward that finish line. As I look forward to being a priest beyond being a pastor, I also seek to exist with a purposeful life-death intensity that helps me be aware of things that are most important and accentuate meaningful moments and encounters while reaching my journey’s end.
UPON THIS ROCK 
This is beautiful Father Don. I think it expresses the desires of many of us who seek more in retirement and want to leave behind the encumbrances to live an authentic life in our days “at the end of the runway”… St Francis is already lay led in many ways but I look forward to learning how our lay leaders are working with you for the future when you change roles.
Jeanne Bates
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Congratulations! I’ve been retired for 26 years and I still try to make a difference! I am confident you will definitely continue to make a positive difference in the world!
Joan Bartimus Klug!
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Congratulations on a chance to slow down but continue to do the things you love and believe in to help others. I have enjoyed following you on your podcasts and love when Barbie joins you. It has been years since we have seen you. I am sure Chris told you that Becky’s (the youngest) son was ordained a priest in May. Mary is still the kind lady we have always known but unfortunately she has Alzheimers and doesn’t recall what you tell her but she remembers people and stories from her past. She has always shared her love for your mother.
Blessings,
Linda (Danny) Abel
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I pray your “retirement “ goals, dreams, and hopes come true! God hear his prayers as you pour out your bountiful grace and everlasting love!
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Fr Don, you have enhanced the lives of so many people, both in and out of your parishes. You have dearly earned retirement from the administrative duties. I know you will continue to joyfully serve as a true disciple of Jesus. Blessings to you always!
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Fr. Don: I love today’s message! Looking forward to seeing you again on my next visit to KC.
Rodney W.
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I hope this day comes sooner rather than later. We cherish your spiritual guidance and support. Administration is a hindrance to your real gifts.
Mary Jo
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Beautifully said, absolutely every word. I have never understood why people don’t understand that priests are also human beings, and they need to slow down, have fewer responsibilities pressing on them, enjoy latter years, and have more free choice in how they wish to slow down. You honestly could write books that people would understand your messages, and maybe see where their demands on clergy are not always the kindest ways that the most influential people in their lives are being treated. Bravo to you for writing this. Jim and Janie Robinson, friends of Hal Middleton from Richmond, Mo.
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You are such a beautiful gift to all of us, Father Farnan! Libby (Whitaker) Cessor
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Father Farnan,
You have been such a blessing to our family and to so many when we really were questioning the Catholic Church. You married our daughter and son-in-law, heard their oldest son’s confession last year at Visitation, and will always hold a special place in our hearts. Thank you for all that you do!!!!
Michelle Nemmers
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Father Don. Your guidance and wisdom has helped so many including our family. Prayers you enjoy your retirement chapter as you continue to support those in need and many searching to be closer to God. Personally Thank you for years in Blue Springs when Mary was growing up. Thank you for support when I was caregiver to Joe. I’m looking now how to serve age 75 in November. May God Hold You In the Palm of His Hand 🙏🏻. Bless you. Anne Mahoney
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Father Don. I’m still working at 89. I know retirement sounds great but truthfully it sucks. It is for quitters and one thing I know, you are not a quitter. When you find yourself hitting your head against a concrete block and you tire of the pain you have a couple of choices: Find a softer rock or grow a thicker skull. But you don’t quit. You and your message are way too important for we the people who count on your spiritual wisdom to guide us. So find the softer rock and keep up the work God has called you to do. Horrible sinners like myself need you dammit! God Bless us all.
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Excellent words about rerirement. I admire your passion for helping people and understand your comments about the “corporate” church. Keep on giving this example.
Bob Reiter
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